Dress
At First Glance
He gives her beautiful clothes. He's so thoughtful!
The Reality
"We had some wonderful years together. When I was younger, I used to make myself beautiful for him. He often complimented me. He was proud to walk down the street with me and even quite jealous. He took my hand when men stared at me. Since my stroke, I can feel that his gaze is no longer the same. It's as if my beauty disappeared when I lost the use of a leg and an arm. One day, I put on his favourite dress for a special occasion. He looked at me with disgust. He told me that on top of having to look after me and drag my wheelchair around every day, I'd better not embarrass him with this dress that shows off my "useless" leg. He threw me a pair of pants, the only kind he lets me wear in public. Months later, he still told our friends about it, laughing and saying that I still thought I was young and pretty."
The Signs
Controlling her appearance, humiliating her and mocking her disability are all examples of coercive control
Why is this Coercive Control?
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01
Clothing choices
He decides what clothes she wears based on his wishes as if she were his possession.
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02
Humiliations
He belittles and humiliates her, both publicly and privately, because of her disability.
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03
Exploitation of dependency
His domination over her is reinforced by her dependence on him for transportation and daily activities.
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